Thought Leadership in Action

Relationships with clients are central to every law practice. Clients may seek you out because of your technical expertise, but they are unlikely to retain your services unless they develop a rapport with you. Similarly, no law practice can operate effectively without substantial cooperation between partners, associates, and staff.

The ability to relate well to others and to manage your own emotions is often referred to as “emotional intelligence.” A raft of studies have shown that possessing a high emotional intelligence quotient (EQ) contributes at least as much to career success as intellectual abilities, and it may actually be far more valuable than analytical skills for people in leadership positions or customer-facing roles.

Because the training lawyers receive emphasizes knowledge of the law and not psychology, the value of getting along well with others often goes unrecognized. EQ represents a tangible set of skills that can be measured and, to a certain extent, learned.

EQ involves not just relating to others, but understanding and regulating the self. Psychologist Daniel Goleman, who popularized the concept of emotional intelligence with a series of bestselling books on the subject, has defined EQ as a set of related competencies that support the ability to create and manage relationships effectively and to communicate and interact appropriately in a wide range of social situations. Goleman has identified two broad categories of emotional intelligence: personal competence and social competence. The main aspects of personal competence are self-awareness, self-management, and motivation; the primary components of social competence are empathy and social skills.

Self-awareness involves knowledge of your emotions. If you are conscious of what you are feeling, you can take action to handle those feelings constructively. Being in touch with your own emotions enables you to better empathize with the feelings of others. In addition, developing self-awareness entails making an accurate assessment of your individual strengths and weaknesses. When you know yourself well, you are more likely to seek out projects that call for your particular talents, while approaching with greater caution projects you would find more difficult. Identifying your areas of weakness can also alert you to the need to improve in certain areas.

The most obvious element of self-management is self-control. The ability to control your temper when angry or remain calm under pressure is clearly useful in workplace situations. But self-management also implies trustworthiness and conscientiousness. A person who is trustworthy demonstrates a high level of integrity in all dealings, while a conscientious person shows up on time, works hard, and takes responsibility for mistakes. Good self-management also includes the ability to adapt to changing circumstances and to stay open to new ideas.

In your dealings with people, possessing a high degree of empathy will serve you well. Clients facing legal problems are frequently anxious and upset. While your training may lead you to seek the best possible the legal remedy for your client, you should also be aware of the client’s emotional state. By listening carefully to the client’s views on the case, you can better craft an approach that is in line with his or her expectations. Even if these expectations prove to be unreasonable, knowing the client’s motivations can help you to offer better advice and guidance.

Among the core competencies of the emotionally intelligent attorney are good communication skills and the ability to influence others. You can persuade others by appealing to their emotions, not just through rational argument. This requires a willingness to listen and communicate your views in a calm and convincing manner. Conducting or mediating a conflict so that the discussion remains fair and constructive, and finding a way to deescalate a conflict when it gets heated, is a key part of a lawyer’s job.

Finally, an emotionally intelligent lawyer has the confidence required to inspire and guide others. A leader listens to dissenting views and takes the bigger picture into account, but he or she is also capable of making decisions. Even if you are not yet in charge of others, you can hone your leadership skills within teams or other groups.

Because each of the components that make up EQ is potentially challenging, you may want to consider which types of skills you wish to develop first. Becoming emotionally intelligent is a lifelong undertaking, but ongoing awareness of the tasks involved can help you excel personally and professionally.

*© 2018 Liberty Publishing, Inc. All rights reserved. Distributed by Financial Media Exchange.